1: "Hello, my name is Peterson Thurston the
Fourth."
2: "I thought you said you were the Third."
1:
"I know, but I was lying those other times."
2: "Why
would you lie about something like that?"
1: "Everything
will be revealed in due time."
2: "The bus is going
to be here in a few minutes."
1: "Don't you see,
Hamilton? The bus will never come."
2: "My name isn't
Hamilton."
1: "The bus will never come, Hamilton,
because it's been here the whole time."
2: "What?"
1:
"You are the bus, Hamilton. It's always been you."
2:
"You know what, Peterson? I'm not a bus. You are. You're a big yellow school
bus with exhaust coming out of your butt. How do you like that?"
1:
"I'm not a bus, so you must be speaking metaphorically, referring to my obesity.
That's mean, Hamilton. I thought we were better friends than that."
2:
"I…I didn't mean it that way."
1: "Friends
don't treat each other like fiends. Do you see what I did there? I took the R
out of friends and it became fiends. Do you know what the R stands for? It stands
for rude, and I don't stand for rudeness."
2: "I'm
sorry, Peterson."
1: "It's okay, Ham-Bus. Hey, what's
that over there!"
2: "What? What is it?"
1:
"Just kidding. It's only a lion. And I'm not lion. Do you see what I did
there? I said lion instead of burnt toast. Now let's close our eyes so hard we
cease to exist."