YET ANOTHER CONVERSATION BETWEEN 1 AND 2

1: "Hello, my name is Peterson Thurston the Fourth. Hey, why don't you be Peterson Thurston the Fourth this time?"

2: "No."

1: "Hold on…there."

1: "What?"

2: "Now you're me. I've given you my powers. Use them wisely, Peter-Crap-Collar."

1: "Peter-Crap-Collar?"

2: "That's my nickname. Well…it's yours now. Your comrades started calling you that after you wore that collar made of crap to dinner a few years ago. The dining room smelled so bad, everyone assumed it was the collar, but it turned out to be the old cheese stuck to your armpit hairs."

1: "That's gross."

2: "How did you know there were 144 tiny cheese balls? Wait…of course you know. You have all my powers. Be sure to use them for good, otherwise cheese will start growing on your armpit hairs."

1: "So that's what happened to you during the dinner?"

2: "Actually I super-glued those to my hairs beforehand. I thought they looked festive. Like little ornaments."

1: "You're me now, Hamilton, so why don't you just sit there and read the newspaper like I wanted to do?"

2: "My name isn't Hamilton."

1: "OK, smart guy. What is your real name?"

2: "George Charming."

1: "How…how did you know that?"

2: "I know that because it's my name."

1: "How could you possibly know? Did you steal my wallet?"

2: "My parents didn't raise a thief, Peterson."

1: "Have you been following me around? What else do you know about me? I mean, about yourself."

2: "I'm a hard-working engineer. I eat more canned beans than I'd like to admit. When I was twelve years old I stole 40 dollars from my mother's wallet and I've always wanted to tell her the truth, but never have."

1: "I never told anyone about that. Are you some sort of psychic?"

2: "Could you please stop talking to me, Peterson? This has been entertaining, but I've never really been one for entertainment."

1: "Maybe you're some sort of wizard. And maybe…maybe I have your powers now. If you don't tell me what's going on, I'm going to shoot 144 rabid trout out my fingertips."

2: "That's a stupid power."

1: "You're a stupid power."

2: "What does that even mean?"

1: "I'm sorry, Hamilton. I don't know what got into me. I feel much better now. I feel like kittens and sunshine."

2: "Great. Hey, why are you wearing my suit? Why am I wearing your muumuu?"

1: "It's just one of life's little mysteries. Like candied fruits or dried fruits. Let's close our eyes and believe."

2: "Believe what?"

1: "Shh…I'll tell you when you're older."